Talking to Myself

Closed eyes reveals myself more than eyes wide open. Adnan Kakazai.

Dependency – An energy booster or a silent killer


All our lives we are dependent on others one way or the other. These dependencies are there throughout the different episodes of our lives and with passage of time change gravity, magnitude and above all path. As George Bernard Shaw puts it “Independence? That’s middle class blasphemy. We are all dependent on one another, every soul of us on earth.”

This world awaits us as we open our eyes; we are directly dependent on our parents and at that time particularly on mother. She is the learning ground, the starting point of a long journey ahead in which there are sunlight’s, shades, hurricanes and azure skies. Though we can’t remember a single second passed on those dependency days/months but we are always in a process of absorbing different shades of life as we pass through spring, summer, autumn and winter, some may be good and worth remembering and other to be forgotten as soon as possible though we know this at very later stage of life. Also, we don’t know the gravity of dependency on mother at that time and may be once we grow up we still don’t know that.

The school, college, university and crossing through the teens we somehow do feel that we have got all the things now and we have overcome all the hardships of the life and at that particular moment we feel that we are something. We at that stage of life are on crossroads of leaving the dependency of the parents and somehow wanting to be dependent by ourselves. But a silent dependency on parents will remain there at this stage of life also which we normally don’t think that actually we are dependent on parents for settlement till we don’t get a job or a life.

Then in job, being independent, we feel on the highest ebb of our lives, all things seems to be working, all things happy and most of the time at the early stages money is always enough for a single person to carry out things in the life. Dependency on that stage is somehow in the middle because at this stage one feels that now there is at least no dependency on anybody. But silently we are dependent on that stage also. On fate, on luck, to set us on a path which leads to a better life, better future.

Then love, marriage comes in one’s life. This stage is as critical as the previous one but dependency here on your love, partner will not leave you till your grave. Here the dependency is everlasting and like pervious cases when the dependency transfer from one to other and so on, here at this stage there is no transferring of dependency, here you are dependent on your partner to carry you through to the hardships of the life, to be with you in all the circumstance to make you feel that yes, you can depend on me and I will not let you down. Life and events become complicated as well as easy if the person on whom you are dependent is your wife and love at the same time though the nature of complexity or the easiness varies case to case.

So no matter what, we are dependent on one way or the other on persons, on love, on fate, on luck. It is at the same time a silent killer and an energy booster. Everybody wants to be in the zone of an energy booster because at the middle and later stages of life one need dependency actually and if that leads to give you more strength, motivation, make you feel strong then indeed life pass smoothly though may be not a common thing now-a-days. I hope to be on the side of energy gaining rather than energy losing. As John Gray puts it “Men are motivated when they feel needed while women are motivated when they feel cherished.” (Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus)

Having said all this, there is a most critical stage still remaining, as both husband and wife, companions will have to be old at a stage in their lives and then story of life take a unique turn. Now may be both if living together, or one (if one died in a long journey together) are/is in turn depend on children to be with them for the rest of their lives. A circle completes here, back to square one but curiously, the outcome of that dependency is not exactly known by all as there is a very thin line to be dependent on that stage on children on whom you have put all the golden years of your life or as one can say, nursing/elderly aged old houses are made for a purpose and may be one of that is waiting for us also or maybe not.

Preferably as mentioned, dependency on the energy booster side, only a wish one can make that the real dependent companions may leave this world together so that the long journey which starts when both start living together, struggle, children, and life may end together as it was once started together. Nobody wants dependency to be a silent killer.


Author: Adnan Kakazai

A hobbyist photographer who likes to travel...

2 thoughts on “Dependency – An energy booster or a silent killer

  1. Much to think about in this issue that we all face at various levels through out our lives. Thanks, as always for shinning the light on another area of life that all too often is pushed aside. hugs, pat

  2. Thanks for liking,
    We are dependent creatures throughout our lives….
    Energy booster vs. Silent killer

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